Belief in Positive Intent: A Positive Approach to Difficult Conversations

As a leader, an important belief to cultivate is the assumption that others have positive intentions. Most people show up, and want to do a good job. This belief will shape the way you approach conversations with members of your team, even in difficult situations. By adopting a positive approach, you will make the person feel supported, and they will know that you want the best for them. Even when a person's performance does not align with your expectations, a belief that their intentions were good will guide your conversation with them. To illustrate this point, let's consider a conversation between a manager and an employee, Kim, who was struggling in her role as a nursing assistant.

During a coaching conversation, the manager provided honest feedback about Kim's performance. The manager then shared with Kim that although her performance was not meeting expectations, they believed that her intentions were positive. The manager went on to explain that in order for Kim to be successful, drastic improvements would need to be made. This opened the door for a conversation about Kim's strengths and talents, and how she could use them to be successful in ways that aligned with her interests. Despite the manager's difficult message, Kim left the conversation with hope and assurance that her future was bright.

In fact, Kim shared with the manager that her dream was to become a chef and that she did not enjoy working in healthcare. The manager supported Kim's aspirations and encouraged her to pursue her passion, which led to Kim excelling in culinary school. This positive outcome was possible because the manager chose to approach the conversation with empathy and positivity, even when delivering difficult news.

In summary, as a leader, adopting a positive approach and believing in the positive intentions of others is crucial to building trust and facilitating growth. When facing difficult conversations, start by expressing appreciation and recognizing the individual's strengths. Then, deliver your message with empathy and a focus on finding a positive path forward. This approach can help individuals overcome challenges and realize their full potential.